SERIOUSLY, Can We Talk?

Tuesday, September 26, 2017

SMILES: A Different Kind of Ministry

A joyful heart makes a cheerful
face, but when the heart is sad the
spirit is broken (Prov. 15:13 NASB)

Sundays are not just a day of worship and rest for me; it's also the day I catch busy friends and relatives for long and pleasant chats! Such was the case a few days ago when I called a nephew in Chicago and he blessed me with news of an incredible ministry he is now involved in! Well, he didn't realize it was a ministry, but tell me what you think!

Due to a recent and painful season in his personal life, he found himself with too much free time and too little money for his comfort! So he decided to become an Uber driver. With his quick wit, charming personality, and surprising vast knowledge of the bible (he's not a member of any church) this has proven to be a perfect fit for him!

He of course meets all types of people as you would imagine, but there was one that he definitely made an impression on! It was a celebrity television news anchor who was so infatuated with his positive attitude and great smile that she posted a selfie with him on her Facebook page and mentioned him by name on the air! Her simple tag: You have the Power to Brighten Someone's Day! got me to thinking. What if we all made a conscious effort to SMILE more!!!

Now, I know this sounds too simplistic for a lot of Christians. We want something with a little more spiritual oomph to it...preaching, teaching, street evangelism, healing, and praying for deliverance sounds more like we're doing God's work! Sitting and grinning doesn't quite make it in our Book of Righteous Works! But Sisters, do you realize what the power of a smile or the lack of one can do? Just as the moon gets its glorious brightness from the reflection of the S-U-N, every ministry done with a SMILE, reflects the love of the S-O-N (Jesus Christ) in us!

Here are some things we need to consider:

First, God loves to see His children smile! He's concerned when they don't! Take the case of Cain in Genesis 4:6-7. When his sacrifice was rejected by God for being inadequate, Cain didn't say anything but his face and attitude betrayed him. His lack of a smile showed disappointment and even after being instructed lovingly how to remedy the situation continued the sullen behavior until the whole matter became too much for him and he killed his brother, Abel! (Proverbs 18:14 - A man's spirit will endure sickness, but a crushed spirit who can bear?) A smile and a good attitude might have prevented a murder!

Second, God is not the only One concerned when you don't smile, others are too! If you've ever had a job involving customer relations, you know how important it is to present yourself to the public with a smile! It helps people relax. Engaging in conversations, even difficult ones gets easier, and whatever you have to deal with begins on a more positive note. Nehemiah, cupbearer to the King in Nehemiah 2:1-3 found this out when his usual cheerful attitude was missing and drew the King's attention. This gave Nehemiah the perfect scenario to describe the suffering of his brethren and get the needed resources from the King to help them out of a difficult situation. (Proverbs 12:25 - Anxiety in a man's heart weighs him down, but a good word make him glad.) The lack of a smile can be a strong indicator of a need that can only be met by you!

Third, a smile doesn't always mean that one is truly happy! Some people smile only when things are going well. Having their way is the only time a smile is worth showing! But happiness is a poor substitute for true joy isn't it? I think King Ahab would agree! In I Kings 21:4-7, the king is unable to clinch a deal with Naboth for a desired vineyard. So he goes home and sulks and grows increasingly depressed. Jezebel his wife tires of his attitude and hoping to lift his spirits has Naboth slandered and murdered seizing the property. However, Ahab's smiles of temporary happiness soon turn to sadness as he and his family suffer under the judgement of God prophesied by Elijah. (Proverbs 15:15 -All the days of the afflicted are evil, but the cheerful heart has a continual feast.) Smiling (especially when you don't feel like it) shows you are waiting on Someone greater to bring you joy!

What have we learned about this unique but often neglected Ministry of Smiles?

Heartaches, disappointments, and trials in life must be mastered. Don't take your frustrations out on others. Smile no matter what's going on. It's good medicine for the broken-hearted! (Proverbs 17:22)

God is greater than any of our fears and anxieties. Read God's Word, Pray and Seek out the very best resources available to help relieve the situation, but remember that you also must avail yourself to be the answer to another person's prayers! (James 2:16)

Smiles need to be genuine and not just reserved for times when you get your way or to impress certain groups of people. Be a reflection of God's love, grace and wisdom wherever you go and in whatever you do! (Eccles. 8:1b)

Smiles are not just for ushers, greeters, church receptionists, or those serving on the hospitality ministry. This is a ministry that EVERYONE belongs to!

WE SHALL NEVER KNOW ALL THE GOOD THAT

A SIMPLE SMILE CAN DO!

- Mother Teresa

UNTIL NEXT TIME...

If you would like to leave a comment please send an email to: sisters4sisters@att.net OR scroll to the bottom of my blog page at http://alittlewiser63.blogspot.com click on the no comments by the pencil and it will change to a writing space.

Tuesday, September 12, 2017

From Mediocrity to MAJESTY!

"You have made them a little lower
than the angels and crowned them with
glory and honor." (Psalm 8:5)

Joy, pure joy! That's the only word that comes to mind when I think of Sunday's celebration of women at my church. How does that old hymn go? What a fellowship, what a joy divine, leaning on the everlasting arms...

This was the finale of our annual women's bible study and while jubilant over the book, Living In the Pink, by Sharon Tubbs, I think we all felt a bit overwhelmed and surprised by the bonding that took place over the six weeks we were together.

It was a journey of transparency, reflection, and revival as we compared our lives with those of the characters in the study, wincing often when one of them stirred up some familiar guilt or pain. But somehow we always came away inspired and never condemned; evidence of the grace of God permeating this wonderful book.

The highlight of course was the author, Sharon Tubbs as our guest speaker for the day! Having met a few celebrity writers, I couldn't vouch for the character of any one of them if you asked me! But Sharon's passion and authenticity is readily apparent! She desires to do her part in bringing every Christians into the divine power and authority for which they were created (Psalm 8:5; Ephesians 2:10; Hebrews 2:7). In other words, to take us from Mediocrity to Majesty!

Here's a brief summary of her message:

Mediocrity is going to church on Sunday. Majesty is trying to be like Christ seven days a week!

Mediocrity is praying for where God wants to take you. Majesty is praying for where God wants to use you!

Mediocrity is encouraging your significant other to come to church. Majesty is not sleeping with him the night before!

The move from Mediocrity to Majesty is all about Stretching!

1. Stretching beyond a life of "Me" - Nehemiah 1 - Comfortable in Persia, Nehemiah was concerned about his brothers suffering in Jerusalem. He sacrificed prestige and a plush environment to do something about it!

2. Stretching beyond "They and Them" (Living to please others) - Genesis 29:31. Leah, the unloved wife of Jacob tried to win his favor by producing multiple male heirs. She finally comes to the realization that God is the only one she needs to please and it is He that deserves all her praise!

3. Stretching beyond Your Blessings - 2 Kings 4:8-17 - The barren Shunammite woman settled for a mediocre life of complacency. She had no son and hopelessness almost denied her the opportunity. But God taught her through her selfless service to the prophet, Elisha, that when you Delight yourself in the Lord, He will give you the desires of your heart! (Psalms 37:4-5)

Sharon Tubbs asked a question of herself that we should all ask! Where is the greatness in my life? Are my dreams, gifts, and talents buried beneath a facade of mediocrity? If so, it's time to do some Spiritual Stretching:

Stretch UP toward the hills which comes our help! (Psalms 121:1)

Stretch BEYOND the ordinary to the Extraordinary! (Ephesians 3:20)

Stretch OUT, bringing someone else with you as you discover the majesty of this truth...we are made just a little lower than the angels and crowned with glory and honor! (Ps. 8:5)

Sunday, August 27, 2017

Changing Our Minds About CHANGE!

"Be not conformed to this world
but be ye transformed... (Rom. 12:2)

Little Fox, one of the stories in the book, Living In the Pink, by author Sharon Tubbs, is about the difficulty of change. This is one of several vignettes about Christian life, the women in my church is studying. Sharon takes a very humorous but revealing look at the practice of saving seats in black churches.

The whole matter was brought to light recently by brilliant cast members (also from my church) who performed it live in a session of our annual women's bible study. We laughed ourselves silly at the antics of Sis. Sho'Nuff and her Bestie, Sis. Towery, but in the end, more than a few of us were convicted of the spirit of rebellion when it comes to change! How silly of us! Is there any other way to become more like Christ? That IS our goal isn't it?

For so many years we have been taught to fear change. Call it mass insecurity if you like! And to be truthful for a lot of people good things have not always come in the aftermath of most of them. But in Christ we need not feel that way! In fact, we should embrace change because we know Who the Change Agent is and He always works it out for our good (Romans 8:28-30)

My challenge to you and a reminder for myself is to learn to recognize when it is time to change and to accept it with faith in our Lord Jesus Christ! I'm not asking you to toss out the beneficial and valuable traditions that have proven to add to our faith and character. I too, am a product of a rich and undeniable strong familial, church, and ethnic culture. All have stood me well and I proudly pass them down to the next generation.

I'm simply calling to your attention, that our entrance into eternity and into a world free from the evil, violence, sickness, and devastation we're witnessing today will only come on the wings of change! (I Corin. 15:51-57, I Thess. 4:15-17) We will not be able to claim fully God's promises in the next life nor will be able to withstand the difficulties of this one without embracing a mindset of change!

No one is saying that change is easy! But change does NOT have to be ugly! You know what I'm talking about don't you? In I Samuel 15:23 the Prophet Samuel spoke these words to King Saul: Rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft and arrogance (pride) like the evil of idolatry. I thought about that for a bit. When I resist change so vehemently as to cause chaos and confusion who am I serving? I can only conclude that I'm not serving God, but MYSELF!

The Only Antidote For The Fear of Change is Trust in God! It works because:

1. "I the Lord do not change." (Malachi 3:6) Change will not destroy you because God's faithfulness toward you does not change!

2. "We are made new in the attitude of our minds...created to be like God" (Ephes. 4:22-24
To grow in righteousness and holiness requires that we change old attitudes.

3. " Forget the former things; do not dwell on them. See, I am doing a new thing!" (Is. 43:18-19) What God has in store for you is more glorious than what you think you've lost!

SUCCESSFUL CHANGE REQUIRES PRAYER AND TRUTH BUT ABOVE ALL TRUST!

Tuesday, August 15, 2017

Wounds of My Sister

Faithful are the wounds of a friend...
(Proverbs 27:6)

I thought I was done with talking about hurt after a women's bible study I facilitated a few years ago. About 150 women and myself took a deep look at the wounds in our life. Those we endured and those we inflicted on others!

Although we had no expectations that the study would answer every question we had about our pain; with the Lord's help, surely we could come away with a better understanding and coping strategy! I think for most of us we were able to do just that!

However, recently as we've ventured once again into a study of self revelation and reflection, I've discovered a pain that didn't quite manifest itself in the past one. We talked about Church hurt, Father wounds, Self hurt, and the like from both the physical and emotional perspective but not so much this one. It is a form of Self hurt, I suppose, as it cuts deep into our own souls, festers, and spreads its poison into our family, work, and all other social circles. It's called Sister Wounds!

Sister wounds are the intentional (and sometimes unintentional) infliction of pain upon another female to render victims powerless, in order to achieve feelings of significance, value, or wholeness missing in other parts of our lives. [my definition]

It is very much like the crab in a bucket metaphor. Women in similar situations, face a common fate or opportunity, sees one rising above the fray, and pulls her down to perish with the rest!
We do this by discouraging, isolating, and otherwise minimizing her gifts and talents! Its root cause is jealousy fueled by insecurity and is one of seven deadly sins women commit against other women far too often. Interestingly, I came across an internet post that really explained it well. Take a look at it when
you get a chance. http://oldgreenshoe.blogspot.com/2005/11/seven-deadly-sins-of-sisterhood.html

Apparently, Sister wounding is as old as the sin that it is because I found evidence of it even in the Bible. Take the case of Sarai and Hagar (Genesis 16:1-7). Sarai, Abraham's wife could not have children but an acceptable custom of the time was to use a surrogate. She chose her handmaiden, Hagar but when she conceived and bore Ishmael, Sarai's old insecurities cropped up and she put both Hagar and her son out! The bible doesn't tell us all the details but I believe there was enough blame on both sides. Hagar no doubt flaunted her fertility in the face of her broken sister so we see that the Sister Wound sword was perhaps slashing both ways! Their inability to coexist in harmony is one of the reasons Muslims and Jews are mortal enemies today!

Another situation, this too having to do with child bearing, was the story of Hannah and Peninnah (I Samuel 1:6-16). Verse 6 tells us that Hannah was teased continually by her Sister wife, Peninnah because she could not bear children, again exploiting another sister's weakness to fulfill a selfish need. Even the love of Elkanah, the husband was not enough to soothe her pain. This shows you how deeply devastating it can get.

Yet all, wounding is not bad! Sometimes the truth hurts for a short time but brings long-lasting good in a situation! Just as a surgeon may have to open a wound to release the poison lying deep within, in our Sister relationships we may have to do the same thing! The difference is our motivation (Ephesians 4:15) . Proverbs 27:6 tells us that a Sister Friend's words, even when they hurt is faithful (can be trusted) to have our best interest at heart! It is the so-called friend who flatters and allows us to behave recklessly to our own detriment that is the true enemy.

Sister wounds are often generational, pain passed down from a mother to daughter then from a sister to a sibling. It can come from experiences early in childhood, never dealt with or betrayals of many sorts still existing. But this we must remember!

Wounding that is malicious is comparable to murder! (Prov. 18:21)
Wounding that is compassionate and loving heals many pains (Prov.16:24)

My Sister, If you must wound me,

Wound me with the Truth

Then Pray with Me until I Heal!

Sunday, July 23, 2017

Up Where We Belong: Reach For It!

But those who trust in the Lord
will find new strength. They will
soar high on wings like eagles
(Isaiah 40:31 NLT)

In this 21st century, it seems implausible that women are still seeking empowerment! Now I know that covers a lot of territory depending on where you see the lack. Maybe its on the job where the proverbial glass ceiling is holding tough. Or perhaps you're still nursing your wounds over the fact that Hilary Clinton wasn't elected President of the United States. If you're a Feminist, we could stay on this subject all day long....but do we need to?

As a woman, I too am tired of women being the butt of every joke. Demeaned in every rap song, objectified in media of every type, and a cliche in every serious discussion. But what saddens me most is that for some of us, we've begun to drink the Kool-aid (believe that it is so) and have started acting the part! I'm here to remind you that it is time to grab another sister and victoriously Rise Up Where We Belong...To Reach our highest potential in Christ! To Become More of Who We Already Are in HIM!

I don't know about you but when I'm in need of inspiration, I don't run to the nearest bookstore and find a New York Times best seller on the subject. I look in God's Word, and it never fails me. I get just what I need to put me on the right path. More times than a few, His Word points me to the simple things in nature, for example the awesome and majestic eagle!

In Isaiah 40:31, I'm encouraged to wait on the Lord and He shall renew my strength and I will mount up with wings as an eagle, run but not be weary and walk and not be faint. Is that not the perfect remedy for weariness of the mind and soul?

The great eagle in many pictures looks fierce and intimidating but don't you know it has the gentle heart of a mother beating beneath its wings. Deuteronomy 32:11 shows me the crucial balance between sternness and maternal protectiveness. Like an eagle that stirs up its nest and hovers over its young, that spreads its wings to catch them and carries them aloft. Doesn't that sound like the God-given perseverance every mother must have for rearing healthy children?

What I'm saying is this...Stop letting other people define you! Keeping you stuck in a box of their own making! 2 Peter 1:3 says, His divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of Him who called us by His own glory and goodness. His calling in our lives is to reach our full potential in Him! But the only way we can break through to these new heights is to:

1. Avoid Negative Self-Talk (Eph. 4:29). Take these three phrases out of your vocabulary: I can't...(I can do all things through Christ who strengthen me. Phil. 4:13). I don't... have the qualifications; the experience, the boldness, the finances. (And my God shall supply all my needs according to His riches in Christ Jesus, Phil. 4:19). I'm not...smart enough, strong enough, attractive enough. (I am the Lord, the God of all mankind. Is anything too hard for me? Jer. 32:27)

2. Affirm Yourself in God's Word. (Create a personal affirmations statement to help you grow in God's grace) Here's an example. I know I'm Somebody, Cause God Don't make No Junk!

3. Learn these Lessons from the Eagle, by John Maxwell's Law of Magnetism (Prov. 30:18, 19)

--Eagles make things happen (they don't sit around and watch!)

--Eagles see and seize opportunities

--Eagles influence others

--Eagles add value to others

--Eagles possess an uncommonly great attitude

--Eagles have excellent relationship skills

--Eagles have an eagle track record of success

--Eagles think differently

--Eagles continually grow

Pray This Eagle's Prayer

The road is long, there are mountains in the way,

but we climb each step with You every day.

Lord, lift us up where we belong, where the Eagles cry

on a mountain high!

Lord, lift us up where we belong, far from the world

we know, Up where the clear winds blow.

Amen

(Words adapted from a song written by Buffy Sainte-Marie)

Tuesday, July 11, 2017

HELP WANTED: A Few REAL Women

Teach older women to be quiet and to be
careful how they act also..
(Titus 2:3)

Now a days, it's hard to tell what's real and what's not! I mean how many of us have been duped thinking we were getting a bargain and found out our stuff was fake?

It reminds me of a story about a Christian brother whose friends kept teasing him about settling down. Every time they asked him about getting married, he'd always respond, "Man, I'm waiting for a real woman." Well, one day he found her right there at 10:30 a.m. service. They dated for over two years and he just knew she was perfect for him.

On his wedding night, as he anticipated the "big moment," he looked up and a stranger walked into the room! His "real woman" had taken off her false eyelashes, her wig, took out her partials, and on the floor was a push-up bra and a pair of bootie pops! Just as he started dialing 911, she sweetly said, Honey, it's okay, don't you know? It's awful hard to find a real woman!

I wonder if our hurting teens and young adults (some in church and out) look at the behavior of Self-proclaimed Super Saints say the same thing...it's awful hard to find real women in the church! Let that not be said about you my Sisters. A few weeks ago, I penned a letter to my
younger sisters, sharing an older woman's perspective on cross-generational relationships.
http://alittlewiser63.blogspot.com/2017/06/dear-younger-sister.html

As expected I got a lot of "AMENS" from women in my season and older. However, I want to be fair! I do understand for some young women, the church may be the last place they go for an authentic Titus 2 relationship. Let's remedy that while we still have a chance!

Wisdom teaches that before I start pointing fingers at others to look first at myself. I've been doing that recently but not trusting my own assessment; I also went to the Word of God and have been praying Psalms 139:23-24

23 Look through me, O God, and know my heart. Try me and know my thoughts. 24 See if there is any sinful way in me and lead me in the way that lasts forever.

From my own experience, I see that some older women need to be taught how to look and act like seasoned women of God. Sisters many of us are suffering from an identity crisis! We don't know who we are as older women and as a result our younger sisters are totally confused. I hate to break it to you....but younger women don't really want YOU to be their Girlfriend! They want a REAL woman they can depend on to give them TRUTH with LOVE and RESPECT!

According to Titus 2:3-7

REAL WOMEN TEACH CHARACTER (vs. 3) Reverence has to do with holiness, Holy living! There are some things that real Christians women won't do! It's simply not in our Spiritual DNA. Paul mentions gossiping and drinking but being mean spirited and nasty is just as bad. Trash talking and bullying young females whether on the internet are in person is demeaning and detrimental to any relationship you want to nurture.

REAL WOMEN TEACH MODERATION (vs. 4-5) Simply put, to be sensible. What has happened to common sense, Mother wit, Horse sense, things like don't spend more money than you make (accrue credit card debt); Don't talk to strangers (meet, date, hook-up with men you know nothing about); Keep your children out of your personal business (expose them to your on again, off again relationships, vices, etc.) Go to sleep at a decent time and stop eating so much junk food (two reasons many women and their children suffer from obesity and ensuing health problems.)

REAL WOMEN TEACH GOOD THINGS (vs. 7) They not only do so with words but by example. How to value and respect their bodies, to lead with grace in their private and public lives (integrity) and to prioritize what God values and not the present culture. We do this not to impress or to appear spiritual but to bear out the Truth of God's Word...to show that God's way works.

So, the next time a young woman puts up a symbolic HELP WANTED: I NEED A REAL CHRISTIAN WOMAN sign...why not...Step up and Say....APPLY HERE!

UNTIL NEXT TIME...

If you would like to leave a comment please send an email to: sisters4sisters@att.net OR scroll to the bottom of my blog page at http://alittlewiser63.blogspot.com click on the no comments by the pencil and it will change to a writing space.

Sunday, June 18, 2017

SPIRITUAL REWIND: Living In The Pink!

Hello Readers, I'm all giddy, about an upcoming women's bible study scheduled for August of this year! Stepping out of our comfort zone, our women's ministry team unanimously chose a book by a great but under publicized author, Sharon Tubbs. It's called, Living In the Pink and it's published by Moody Press. I read it a few years back and mentioned it in my blog post, Drifting Through Fifty Shades of Pink! I tell you this book is more relevant now than its ever been! Here's an excerpt from that post below:

Isaiah 1:18..Though your sins are like
scarlet, they shall be white as snow..

Coral, blush, rose, hot, salmon, fuchsia, magenta, fandango puce, amaranth, or lemonade, I love the color pink! But I must say, it has a different meaning for me now that I'm engulfed in a novel that a sweet sister gave me over the holidays! It's entitled, Living in the Pink, by Christian author, Sharon Tubbs. When you get a chance pick up a copy...it's riveting, eye-opening, and well, if you're one of those people who seem to be constantly drifting spiritually...very convicting!

Straddling the fence between worldly living and holy living is what Sister Tubbs calls living in the pink...just a tinge of Jesus' blood characterizes our life...we're not completely low-down and heathenish, we just slip in and out of sin periodically! We show up for church every Sunday, but hide out in the corners and the balcony because we don't want anyone to smell the weed and liquor that still lingers after clubbing the night before! (That's living in the pink!)

Don't get me wrong...I know what it means to live in the pink! Denying my faith for a season of fleshly pleasure...but as my Mama used to say..."When you know better you do better!" 2015 should be a time to do better --DON'T THINK PINK...THINK RED...THE COLOR OF CHRIST'S PRECIOUS BLOOD (Hebrews 9:22) Without it Where would we be?

END OF EXCERPT

Pretty convicting isn't it? I've met this wonderful author and dialogued with her a bit about her incredible insightful look into "church life" ion many urban black communities! All the sisters I know who have had a chance to read it say the same things..."These scenarios are so REAL!...I can relate to more than one of these stories!...We've got to do THIS one!!!

This is the kind of study that I pray will bring authenticity back to the church and bridge the generation gap between Old and New School Saints. It is an opportunity to look back (in a wholesome way) at our past, celebrate the present, and joyfully look forward to our future!
No longer do we have to walk through life with the stain of sin splattered on Christ's robe of righteousness! (Ephesians 4:22-26). No longer once we've tasted victory of the flesh need we feel condemned (Romans 8:1).

It's time to yank the masks off all those Super Saints and talk about some real needs in the church! As Sis. Pinky (a character in the book) says: "Don't let your past be your shame..turn it around and make it your testimony!"

UNTIL NEXT TIME...

If you would like to leave a comment please send an email to: sisters4sisters@att.net OR scroll to the bottom of my blog page at http://alittlewiser63.blogspot.com click on the no comments by the pencil and it will change to a writing space.